Oh god, I’m semi-packed for London after two weeks straight from HELL and NOW I have time to actually start panicking about flying of which I’m quite afraid x)

Yeah idk if I said it here but I’m actually going to MCM Comic Con in London tomorroooowwww! I’ll go with the lovely Helena​ and their friends for hangie outies and to visit the Critical Role panel on Saturday, and possibly, to spend all my money on nerdy shit :33333

I am very. Nervous. Just absolutely fucking panicking left and right. I’m mostly just terrified of dissociating because then I’m not gonna fucking remember the weekend which would be a shame x) Also it’s great. Awesome. That my spine is just so bad after these two weeks. With the three-day thing last week and having to work overtime n having to lift things and bike here and go there this week, I’m finding myself actually unable to breathe because it puts such a pressure on my upper spine that I just can’t bear it.

So that’ll be fun. But I just have to do one day and then on Sunday I can come home and die as much as I want. 

My brain is just absolute spaghetti about English too because I don’t think I’ve actually spoken to real-life native English speakers before x) Apart from the dude in our village but that was like, three sentences. Cause with Ines and Giules and the others it’s like, neither of us are native speakers so it’s mutual grounds ok but I’m right intimidated. It’s much better in writing when I have time to think about stuff. And even then I suck.

But yeah okay so just generally very nervous about being weird and not being able to like, be normal somehow and then everyone will hate me and I’ll be sad. Like I’ve been legit googling shit like “how to be normal around normal people when you’re Very Anxious” today. And after almost cancelling this whole thing like seven times in the past three months apparently one tip for being normal is actually going outside so. Imma do that.