Some of the new items from my fave D&D NPC’s refurbished Slightly-Cursed Items Shop, in which she sells my players items ranging from effectively useless to legitimately deadly – but always entertaining. Feel free to use these tragedies!
This is literally the most bomb-ass D&D story I’ve ever read in my life oh my god.
Holy shit ._.
Some RP sessions have better stories than actual fiction. I mean, goddamn.
For those having trouble reading the text:
We had a campaign in D&D where we assembled a steampunk-ish time machine. After many sessions travelling through time, uncovering mysteries and learning harsh lessons about changing history, we had to stop a time-travelling cult from destroying the gods, and therefore the world. We failed.
Our machine crashed, we were stranded earlier than we had ever been able to travel. We found the Gods, but only a few of them were present – it was as if some had never existed. Then we realised – we had to become those Gods. Our party was entirely divine (Cleric, Paladin, Avenger, Invoker), and each of us was a worshipper of a god who had been unmade – and we were the only people in existence with enough knowledge of the forgotten deities to assume their roles.
But two of the players were worshippers of Io (in his twin forms of Tiamat and Bahamut, who would of course form later after Io’s ‘death’), and only one could become Io. The other would have to be the un-created Asmodeus.
So the most just, honourable and dedicated Lawful Good paladin I’ve ever seen roleplayed became the god of tyranny and evil. If he hadn’t, the gods would never have defeated the primordials, and the world would never have been completed.
In our setting, Asmodeus is every bit the epitome of evil you would expect him to be. Nobody but the gods who abide his presence know him as otherwise. He adheres to his role because he knows he has to – and that in doing so, the world can exist. He can never tell anyone his duty, and no-one who knows can ever discuss it.
In the farthest recesses of the Nine Hells, in a chamber sealed tighter than any other in existence is a pocketwatch of finest gnome craft with a photo of his family in it – his wife, son, and little baby girl.
They were killed by an orc army marching under the orders and banner of Asmodeus. Their deaths are what drove him to become an adventurer.
more dnd campaigns with overtly fantastic plots. full on fairy tale bullshit. like something out of mythology or a fable.
the party is tasked to retrieve the moon, which has been stolen from the sky. 87% chance the moon is also sentient.
a color that was locked away by the gods for being too beautiful/terrible/powerful is released again and a dragon of that color now threatens the land. also because it’s new it’s in fashion and everyone who can get their hands on it is wearing this color and it’s starting to give you a headache.
relieve the land of their drought by finding what happened to the rain and bringing it back.
“I pick up the knife” is now a mini-meme among my party and obviously it just means “I did something impulsive and now it’s going to take two sessions to solve.”
“I pick up the knife” saga continues because listen we can sit around failing investigation checks all day or we could play d&d
anyways d&d is a legitimately magical thing that is capable of forging and/or strengthening friendships and doing strange but good things to your emotions, and if you have ever considered getting involved with it but have not yet, i truly do encourage you to find a way to make it happen
Pass Through Fire 