If you want to know what’s stronger in me, my actual hunger after eating a daily averga of 550 calories all week or my anxiety, here’s what’s happening at the moment.
The hamburger place I go to for my Sunday hamburger opens at 10AM but they’re usually not ready to serve hamburgers until 10:30 because idk their… hamburger making machines aren’t ready yet idk, they’re a pastry shop first and foremost so I don’t blame them for not being ready for hamburgers right away.
There’s an even that takes place at one of our memorials today that starts at 10AM. Apart from the fact that I should be there a lot of my co-workers and specifically my two bosses are gonna be there too. That’s fine. BUT the event moves from the statue to an indoor venue and there’ll be this whole fuckin… procession from one place to another and the route they take (it’s like 500m too) is where the hamburger place is. But it’s gonna be quite slow cause there’ll be horses n shit.
They’ll be on that road at 10:30 when I’d be going to get my hamburger but because I don’t want to fucking meet anyone I’m willing to starve another full hour to make sure the whole thing is gone by the time I get there.
And if you’re like “oh but Tia an hour is nothing” yOU DON’T GET IT
This week was surprisingly easy but I guess it’s because I was too stressed out to worry about food so… that’s one use of stress, I guess.
Monday: 496 calories Tuesday: 500 calories Wednesday: 561 calories Thursday: 562 calories Friday: 501 calories Saturday: I was sitting so pretty on 498 calories then my mum handed me a whole ass tuna salad so… 539 calories.
Remember when I worked out? Good times. I still don’t have a place to work out :3
Ideally I’d be at 70kg this Sunday but that’s way too ambitious (I always say this lol, believe me I know, it’s part of the process of trying to please the gods) so I guess I’d be fine with a 70.5kg too. And if I’m not below 71 I’m going to lose my goddamned mind.
GAHH I’M 70.6KG THATS NOT GOOD ENOUGH It’s okay though, I know that the less you weigh the slower you lose weight, it’s fine, it’s fine, 1kg is a good enough accomplishment (she lied, trying to convince herself). It’s okay. I’m mostly frustrated because I want to reach 69kg by the end of the month and if I don’t I’m gonna be pissed cause I want. to eat. a fuckin…. normal… christmas. dINNER.
That’s it, anyway, two and a half hours until hamburger.
(I’m posting this less to correct the timeline portrayed in Bohemian Rhapsody, which I mostly really enjoyed, than simply to share a beautiful story that shines light on who Freddie actually was, up to the very end.)
Pass Through Fire 