mlmsamwilson:

tag yourself as the clients i’ve talked to while working as a telemarketer

• the guy who told me ‘i can’t talk right now i’m at the stables and i’m being attacked by a horse’ and promptly hang up
• the guy who, after being asked if he had the time to listen to my offer, replied with ‘i’m at a funeral right now. but i mean… yeah fine lets do it’
• the lady who told me she couldn’t talk because she’d just cooked an egg and she wanted to eat it while it was still warm
• the dude who was like ‘god i have so much money i dont know what to do with them’
• the poor secretary who told me i couldn’t speak to the doctor i was trying to reach because he’d been fired 13 years ago
• the man who literally gave me a 12 minute monologue on why capitalism is fucked up 
• the woman who finished the call with me, a random bank consultant, with ‘okay bye i love you’
• the guy who kept replying in russian to everything i said
• the guy whose email address was spyagent@sth.com
• the customer whom i accidentally called mr sausage
• the guy whose outgoing voicemail was ‘mmmmmm this yoghurt be YUMMY’
• the client who replied to my offer of increasing his credit card limit with ‘no, i’m too stupid for that’